Dear Agony
by xDracoGenesisx
Summary: A Genesis x Aerith fanfiction: Haunted endlessly by pain and sorrow, Genesis Rhapsodos believes that there is nothing left for him to live for. But is this really true? Is he the only one who can't see that he's not a monster?


**A/N: Another one shot… because I'm too lazy to write another continuing story XD This time it's a Genesis x Aerith fanfiction. I got inspiration for this from the song "Dear Agony" by Breaking Benjamin. So… prepare for angstyness *fails for bad grammar***

_I have nothing left to give; I have found the perfect end  
__You were made to make it hurt; disappear into the dirt  
__Carry me to Heaven's arms; light the way and let me go  
__Take the time to take my breath; I will end where I began  
_… … … … … … … … … … …  
**- Dear Agony; Breaking Benjamin **

It was the dead of night. No light pierced the thick clouds; the moon could barely be seen. The ruins of what was once the town of Banora lay blanketed in shadow below the overcast sky. A single tree, the only one that had remained in tact when Banora was destroyed, swayed in the faint, chilly breeze. Beneath this tree, his shoulders hunched and his back against its trunk, was a young man, not yet past his twenties. He wore a long trench coat of red leather, and his hair was chestnut colored, though strangely streaked with premature gray. The collar and shoulders of his leather coat were also tinted gray, giving him a somewhat curious appearance. The strength expected of one his age could still be seen in his posture, but it was fading fast; the slight tremble of his shoulders portrayed that fact.

Genesis Rhapsodos was degrading faster every day.

He despised it. Always, he could feel it, eating away at his youth, causing his strength to deteriorate. The once 1st Class SOLDIER reached his arm across his chest to rub his left shoulder. His fingers drew across the open gash scarring his shoulder blade and he winced, hot pain searing through his back. _Why? Why isn't it healed yet?_ he thought, panic flashing through his mind. It had been months ago when Angeal had accidentally wounded Genesis during training, and still the stubborn wound refused to close. He knew that the gash, though he had originally thought it "just a scratch", was the source of his steady degradation; Professor Hollander had assured him of that, among other things. Yes, Hollander had assured him of many things, things Genesis wished he had remained oblivious to.

As the young man reflected on this, a tear slowly slid down his cheek. He grunted in annoyance and wiped his eyes with the back of his gloved hand, but more tears followed the first, until he was fully crying. He _hated _himself. Genesis was nothing more than a failure. A freak of nature. A monster. Hollander… Hojo… they were the sources of his angst. He clenched his fists, wishing with all his might that the Jenova Project had never been, that he had never existed.

_Am I even human? _he thought sadly. _Am I just going to rot away like this until my dying day? Why…? Why is this happening to me? _

He glanced over his shoulder at the remains of his hometown.

_I don't even have anything to live for anymore. _

As a small trickle of blood began to fall from the wound in his shoulder, Genesis suddenly remembered something. A memory flashed before him, one that had been all but forgotten in his agony. It surfaced to him now, like a shining light in the darkness.

_A church filled with sweet smelling flowers. In the midst of the petals, singing quietly to herself, was a girl a bit younger than him. She tended the flowers, radiating beauty and tranquility, unaware that he stood watching her in awe from the doorway. Suddenly, she looked up, her enchanting emerald eyes meeting his, a curious expression crossing her visage. Embarrassed, he cast down his gaze, preparing to leave as quickly as possible. However, the beautiful girl stopped him. _

"_Hello? Can I help you?" _

_As she addressed him, he blushed faintly and turned back around, searching for words. _

"_Uh, I was, um, wondering… what kinds of flowers you grew here…" She smiled and approached him, carefully sidestepping the fragrant flowers._

"_Oh! Well, I grow many kinds here. Why do you ask?"_

"_Um… I…" The girl laughed at his obvious embarrassment. His ears only grew hotter. _

"_You're cute, getting all embarrassed like that. What's your name?" He raised his eyes to hers, a bit more confident now that she had changed the subject._

"_Genesis. And yours?" _

"_I'm Aerith," the girl replied, smiling. He thought he saw a small flash of red appear on her cheeks, but it vanished as quickly as it had appeared._

_The two talked for a long time. Genesis tried to avoid the question, but it eventually surfaced, and he could not escape it when it did. _

"_So, what do you do for a living?" Aerith asked innocently. Genesis stiffened._

"_I'm… well… a SOLDIER…" His response came out as barely a whisper. Aerith's eyes widened, and a flash of fear crossed their depths. Dismay blossomed in Genesis' chest, and he lowered his gaze once again._

"_You don't… seem like a SOLDIER… to me…" Surprised by the answer, Genesis looked up again. "What do you mean?" he asked. Aerith's face had become serious; no fear or signs of repulsion graced her features._

"_SOLDIERs usually… impose fear… but you're not scary at all. I like you, Genesis. You're really nice… nicer than any SOLDIER I've met." A strange flutter rose in his breast as she said this, a feeling the 1__st__ Class SOLDIER had never experienced before. He smiled, something he rarely did. "Really?" he said incredulously. She nodded. For a moment, the two were silent, staring into the depths of each other's eyes. Then, Aerith stirred. _

"_Well, my mother will be coming home soon. Sorry, but you should leave… you know how mothers can be…" Although Genesis was disappointed that he had to leave Aerith, he obeyed, for he didn't wish to get her in trouble. As they said their farewells and Genesis approached the door, Aerith called for him to stop and said in a low, slightly embarrassed voice, "I hope we can meet again soon." Smiling once again, Genesis nodded. "Me, too," he replied before pushing open the wooden doors and leaving the church behind._

_Me, too… _

When the memory faded, Genesis grasped at the air before him, as if he could pull it back. "Aerith…" he whispered. Oh, how he wished to see her again. Since that meeting before his injury, he had failed to meet with her. _But, _he thought, _will she still want to see… a monster? _A dull crash resonated above him as the heavens opened up, heavy rain pouring from the clouds. His hair was soon plastered to his head, and the rain made his shoulder burn horribly. Hope left him then, like a spirit leaves a dead body, and he slumped over, his head falling into his hands. He remained as such, motionless, as the rain continued to fall.

Then, he heard something. The young man raised his head slowly, and he heard the sound again. It was the sound of crying. Though it was distant, Genesis knew he had indeed heard it, the sound of sobbing through the pounding of the rain. Something compelled him to find this faint noise, though he knew not what. Groaning with effort, he climbed to his feet, cursing his degradation, and staggered through the rain, clutching his burning shoulder.

He heard the sob again, closer this time, yet still far. "Hello?" he called, straining to raise his voice above a hoarse whisper. "Is there someone there?" The sobs froze; apparently whoever was crying had heard his voice.

"Y-yes…" came the soft reply. At the voice, Genesis stopped in his tracks. _No… it can't be… _he thought. _Could it be her?_

He broke into a run, trampling the wet grass as he bolted towards the noise. After but a few seconds of running, he saw through the driving rain a dark shape huddled against the wall of a crumbled building. As he approached, the form rose her head to gaze at the newcomer. He gasped as a thin ray of moonlight broke through the clouds and revealed her face.

"Genesis…?"

It was, indeed, Aerith. Tears lingered in the corners of her eyes and streaked her face. Her auburn hair was drenched and mangled, and she looked utterly miserable, completely different from the cheerful girl Genesis had originally met. Though she was so upset, Genesis could not help but smile. She was there, right before him, just when he needed her most!

"Aerith! What are you doing here?" He knelt down beside her, concern flashing in his eyes. Aerith gazed steadily at him, silent and bewildered. Then, her eyes softened and she unexpectedly reached out to lightly touch his injured shoulder. He winced at the contact.

"Your shoulder… what happened?" she asked, her voice soft and strangely comforting. Surprised by the inquiry, Genesis backed away slightly, his eyes becoming solemn once more. "It… it doesn't matter," he mumbled. "What really matters is _you_. Why are you crying out here? Aerith, what happened?" The girl was silent for a few moments; he was afraid she would attempt to pursue her first inquiry. However, she did not, and after another moment she replied.

"My home… it was destroyed…"

"What?"

"It was burned down… I don't know why or how… but it's gone!" Sobs once again racked her body. Genesis reached forward and tentatively rested his hand on her shoulder. She stopped and looked up at him again.

"The flowers," she said, "The flowers… are gone, too… I no longer have a home…"

Genesis glanced at the muddy ground beneath him. "I… I don't have a home anymore, either." Aerith tipped her head to one side. "What do you mean?" she asked, her voice broken by suppressed cries. He let his hand slide off of her shoulder and shifted back. "Aerith… I'm not human…" She gazed at him, confusion within her eyes. _Those eyes… those beautiful eyes…_

"I… I'm a genetic experiment. A _failed _one. Jenova Project G… was the source of my birth. I'm a monster. '_There are no dreams, no honor remains…_'" Even quoting _LOVELESS_ gave him no comfort now. Aerith frowned. "Genesis… what are you talking about?" He gritted his teeth as he felt a familiar sting in his eyes. "I'm talking about

_this-"_ he ran his fingers along a strand of his graying hair, "-and… _this._" Shuddering at the very thought of what he was about to do, Genesis drew in a shaky breath and extended his left arm. With the shift of this muscle came another, very unexpected thing. A large ebony wing sprouted from his shoulder blade and stretched out behind him, scattering thin black feathers in its wake. A flash of surprise crossed Aerith's visage, but other than that and a sharp intake of breath, the girl remained motionless.

_She's probably frozen in fear and disgust, _Genesis thought bitterly, despising himself more than ever at that moment. The rather oversized wing remained extended in the air for a moment before he sighed sadly and let it droop, the long feathers trailing in the mud. "You see? I'm disgusting… an _abomination_." There was silence between them; Genesis feared that it was all over now, that Aerith would never want to be near him again. But the girl did something far different from what he expected. She smiled- that warm, comforting smile of hers- and reached out to stroke the feathery appendage. The SOLDIER gasped, and his wing twitched involuntarily at the contact. Aerith ran her fingers down one of the primary feathers, then looked up at him with a strangely blissful look on her face. Genesis gazed back at her, their faces surprisingly close.

"Genesis, your wing is _beautiful_. Why do you think it brands you as a monster? Wings like this… are the wings of an angel, not a beast. Why are you the only one who can't see that?" The young man looked away shamefully. "I… I don't know… I just don't know…"

"Well… will you know this?" Aerith reached up and caressed his cheek, gently turning it to face her again. Before he could react, she kissed him softly. Genesis stared at her, incredulous. A warm feeling blossomed in his chest, and he smiled, all his sorrow washed away by the very sight of the beautiful girl before him. Aerith's face lit up when he smiled; she looked relieved to see it.

"Genesis, you're smiling! I love your smile… promise me you'll do it more often?" He nodded slowly. "Yeah. I promise." The SOLDIER felt like he'd been saved, like Aerith's kiss had pulled him free of the dark void he'd been in for so long. She laughed blissfully and hugged him tightly, stirring up a laugh out of him as well as he embraced her in turn.

_Because of her, I have a reason to live again._


End file.
